Four by f**kers

My nihlistic driving tendancies came out on my way home from work yesterday, leaving some four by four driving ponce and his pseudo footballers-wife with a very big bill.

Don't you just hate those arseholes with their blacked-out windowed, chrome wheeled, twat-mobiles that think they own the road? There just mobile pond life, in Gap clothes.

Well I could see Mr Big Bollocks "Look at me my cars so huge" at the roundabout and something just pissed me off about him driving around like he's David Fucking Beckham with his dumb chav-scum wife on her flip up mobile phone. I had the right of way but Mr Ponce decides that because he's got bullbars, and because his car is so big and threatening he can just force me to stop.

Wrong!

Here's a quick lesson in driving ettiquite - I drive a 20 year old Merc that weighs 2 tons and its so battle scarred that I don't give a shit where it ends up. You on the other hand own a brand new ponce-mobile that cost fifty grand and does not look good with the side hanging out of it.

I almost saw him cry as I grated down the side of it. I reckon I got every panel on the passenger side before he stopped.

Had a great argument afterwards to. He went totally fucking ballistic. It was great.

Called me a fucking moron, and my car a piece of shit [it is], and then I guessed I could get him a bit more angry so I walked up and down surveying the damage before saying calmly "What a shame, it was a lovely paint job".

He called the cops.

After more arguing they agreed I had the right of way and noted it on the accident report so it looks like his insurers are going to pay to fix my car up.

What a result.

What a twat.